I Have A Stalker
Really, I do.
About the time we moved in to our house, our cats started hissing; no, BELLOWING, at about 2:30 the morning on random Tuesdays and Thursdays.
We figured it was another cat and did what we could to keep the natives from getting too restless.
I'll tell you all about a specific incident, only to stress how much this was affecting our currently residing feline members of this family. It is not to be shared among anyone else but us, got it?
Picture this:
It's abotu 3:00 in the morning and I've been deep asleep for about 5 hours now. I'm snuggled warm in bed, my boyfriend's warm body beside me. Mmmm... warm boyfriend. Bed...
I digress.
Where was I? Oh, deep sleep.
I'm sleeping deeply when all of a sudden, the most horrendous noise known to man fills our house, jolting me from my dreams about peaches, tulips and whether I should marry Reggie Miller and have his love child.
To demonstrate, I have pulled this YouTube video for reference:
I cannot embed it because I'm using IE and IE is friggen retarded.
I wake up to THAT noise, only louder because it is 3 cats, in harmony. Only this isn't the kind of music I download on iTunes.
I jolt upright screaming "What happened?!"What's going on?!"GREG!" - My eyeballs have literally popped out of my head, my heart has stopped and without knowing it, I'm throwing back the covers and grabbing, of all things, my pillow, so that whatever's out there, I can throw my deadly pillow at it.
It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I get out to the living room and this is what I see:
We have a peeping Tom(cat)!
Who STARES at our cats. Without fear.
Because, ya know, he's on the OUTSIDE of the glass and not stuck in a house.
Look at me, I'm a dirty cat.
What are you lookin' at, eh?
I made "Is This Your Cat" Posters, printed them and the damn cat never came back. Last week, I saw a dead cat and almost had a heart attack because I thought it was him. But it wasn't.
Smelly cat, smelly cat, where have you gone?
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-me